Discussion: Age-Appropriate Toddler﻿ Scenario * Module 2 Page 24 (12/13)

Discussion: Age-Appropriate Toddler Scenario * Module 2 Page 24 (12/13)

6/4/2016

26 Comments

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Please read the scenario, then discuss the following questions:

Do you think this behavior or expectation is age-appropriate?
If so, how could you explain this to the parents/co-workers?
Is there anything you can do to prevent this situation from happening again?

Toddler Scenario
You have been working with toddlers at the Stay-and-Play Child Care Center for over a year and love their energy and curiosity! A new teacher assistant is subbing with you and tells two toddlers struggling over a toy phone to “share nicely” which just escalates the fighting. She finally removes the toy and tells them no one can have it if they don’t share. The toddlers are now both crying and whining for the phone and the rest of the class is starting to as well. The sub tells you that she is used to kindergartners and doesn’t know what to do with toddlers.

26 Comments

Cayleigh Celli

9/6/2018 09:48:24 pm

This is age appropriate, many children are testing their boundaries and learning how to interact with other children. They also are going through an egotistical phase where they believe the world revolves around them. Its important to explain to the children how to play properly with other children, modeling the correct behavior, and setting expectations.

Shania Kensinger

9/17/2018 06:50:47 pm

I think this is true, although I do think that she should've shown them how to share or explained it because toddlers don't always understand what is being said to them

Amber Waters

9/7/2018 08:38:04 am

I do think that is age-appropriate because toddlers are testing their boundaries and learning to interact with other children. To prevent it from happening again, just get alot of the same kind of phone.

Svetlana Fisher

9/7/2018 07:41:10 pm

The sub should have tried redirecting one of the children to a different toy or activity. But if that didn’t work then maybe take away the toy. This is typical toddler behavior. If they see someone playing with a toy it is automatically a mor interesting toy for them.

Cravionne Hatcher

9/7/2018 10:34:13 pm

It is appropriate behavior for two toddlers to fight over interesting toys/works. I would explain to the coworker that it is okay for a child to not share something that is meant for one child to enjoy at a time, such a toy phone. I would pay attention to whoever had the phone first so that the other child could know that the object current belongs to the other child and that he/she may wait for the other child to be finished or find another thing to do.

Heather L. Borrego

9/8/2018 10:20:01 am

Yes, it is very typical for toddlers to bicker over a single toy.

Although, expecting any two children to play with a toy that is designed for one child, is obviously not going to end well for anyone/everyone that is involved in the situation, or subjected to it.

I would kindly tell my support system (parents/co-teacher) that I appreciated their help. May I, show them how I might handle a similar situation?

I would approach the toddlers bickering over the toy phone and say something like, "hey guys can Miss Heather, have a turn?". At this age I have experienced that the kids are eager to learn from an elder (no matter how insignificantly older, just older) but, toddlers typically are eager to teach the kids their own age or younger.

So, back to the scenario: with my hand out, asking for a turn, I begin using the phone properly. I usually call my own Mother (who is Heaven), I have approximately a 2 minute conversation on the phone talking about my day, with my Mother.
Then I will pass the toy phone to one of the initial kids, telling them it's their turn to call their Mama, at work! I give them a 2 minute verbal timer, followed by the other child's turn. Which, demonstrates to the children; how to use the toy phone properly, Miss Heather calls her Mama, and everybody gets a turn!
Prayerfully, this will help build their own problem-solving skills for their futures.

Kim

9/8/2018 12:14:13 pm

Who had the toy first, redirect one of the children to another toy or activity. What she did was not wrong, just help the children know arguing over a toy is not appropriate and help them make better choices.

Caitlin Draper

9/8/2018 01:44:25 pm

Fighting over toys is age-appropriate for this age, however expecting toddlers to know how to share and taking the toy away when they don't, is not. I would explain to my co-worker that I completely understand the difference in working with this age, as I too used to work with older children before working with toddlers; and we need to model sharing rather than setting a limit they do not understand. I would also provide multiple of each toy to start off with, so that we would be able to work up to sharing a limited toy.

Taeona Caldbeck

9/8/2018 03:04:45 pm

I disagree with some other the comments above. Children fighting is to be expected. And yes, young toddlers are still learning to share. However, I work with toddlers and preschoolers and most of them do understand the concept of sharing. The ones under the age of two don't. I think maybe she should explain sharing a little more and give them a warning before taking the toy away, but I do not think that taking the toy away is wrong. Sometimes even after explaining what sharing is children don't listen, and in a situation like that where they are fighting sometimes it is necessary to remove the toy. After removing it I would start a new activity, and in this situation it would be a good idea to introduce an activity that involves sharing.

CheyeAnne Cooper

9/8/2018 07:37:11 pm

I do believe the behavior is appropriate for this age group and is to be expected. However for the sub I would have said something like "maybe try sitting down at their level and play with them. Pretend someone is calling the phone and wants to talk to the children, put the phone up to one of the childrens ear, then the other childs after a few seconds." This would most likely take their minds off fighting over the toy and it also helps teach them to share.

Kusum Gupta

9/9/2018 12:22:35 pm

Yes, I believe that the behavior of fighting over toys between Toddler children is age appropriate. I would explain to my co-worker that there are many ways, this situation could have been handled. The phone could have been given to first child who was using and explain second child why we need to wait. OR sit with both of them, start playing with both the kids, using either phone or something else which will distract the kids. Also I could start a whole new activity which will distract all kids from previous session to new activity.

Merrily

9/10/2018 08:25:07 pm

I personally think the sub responded in an age-appropriate way. One thing that may have been added is that the two children could try to play with the toy again in a few minutes once they're willing to take turns. Ultimately, there's going to be a loser in this situation. You don't want it to be the entire class because these two children are escalating. Removing, or even replacing, a toy in this situation can diffuse it. If it doesn't, it may be necessary to take the two children aside from the group and talk to them more, so both you and they better understand what happened. Unfortunately, there is no guarantee the situation won't happen again, however, taking time to show you care about each child can create trust and dependability which, in the long run, is a win.

Dawn Hein

9/10/2018 08:57:50 pm

I believe that toddlers are still at the learning stage of sharing and need to be taught how to do so. By simply taking a toy away and saying neither of them get to play with it teaches them nothing. I would recommend going over to the both of them, sitting down, and showing them how to play with it together maybe by even getting another toy that can be played with it as well. It distracts them from fighting and teaches them how to share by everyone getting on the floor and playing. I would then just nicely explain this to the sub on how toddlers just don't respond like kindergartens and by taking a toy away like that only adds frustration.

Dana Fleming

9/11/2018 08:03:26 am

I believe it would have been better for the sub to play with the children fighting over the phone. The sub could have shown the children how to use the phone together as toddlers do not yet understand sharing. Simply taking the toy away caused stress, while sitting down and demonstrating how to share a toy and play together could have been a teachable moment.

Martin

9/11/2018 04:13:11 pm

You can bring another toy into the situation with children. You can personally get into the situation to help.

Tiffany Goos

9/12/2018 12:02:52 pm

yes i do think this appropriate behavior for this age, i would suggest the sub to sit on the floor with the children and teach them how to take turns and play with them so they aren't fighting and make it fun for all of them.

Melanie McNaghten

9/13/2018 06:09:11 pm

I don't think it is realistic to expect 2 year olds to share nicely, however, I do think it is still a behavior to model, so perhaps she could have still said this but then given it to 1 child and let her play with it for a few minutes and then given it to the next child to play with for a few minutes and then explained to the children that this was sharing. She could have then played with each child with a new toy while the other had the toy phone and tried to make something else fun and exciting

Shruti King

9/14/2018 11:09:28 pm

yes its age appropriate, Children have to be shown and taught how to share and what sharing means. they have to be given options which will teach them how to share with their friends which will help them to have more fun playing together

Taylor

9/16/2018 10:03:48 am

Yes I do think it is appropriate to take the toy if the children are not able to share nicely. However, it is important to help them facilitate a situation where they are encouraged to share before deciding that neither of the children can have the toy. When you are able to help the students understand that they can take turns, or that the child who did not have the toy first can ask their friend for a turn before taking the toy it turns in to more of a learning opportunity.

Prashanthi

9/16/2018 05:13:50 pm

The behavior taking place is age appropriate I think because at the toddler stage their mindset is everything is theirs and haven’t got the concept of sharing yet but I would just set a time limit for each child so everyone get a turn and in the meantime find another toy for the other child to play with just to keep the child mind off it until it’s his/her turn.

Stephanie Wooten

9/17/2018 08:37:17 am

1. I absolutely think that the behavior exhibited by the toddlers is age appropriate, and that subsequently the substitute teacher's expectations for their behavior are NOT age-appropriate.

2. I would explain this to parents/co-workers by telling them that toddlers are still working on developing executive function skills. Since executive function involves three subskills (working memory, inhibitory control, and mental flexibility), I would explain that the toddlers do not yet have the inhibitory control to stop trying with such desperation to access the toy that they want. I would then add that being asked to "share nicely" requires a lot more mental flexibility than may be obvious. Sharing requires the mental flexibility to problem-solve and choose who will take a turn first, and who will wait, which then calls upon their use of inhibitory control so that they do not continue to fight over it. It just doesn't make sense for toddlers.

3. The best way to prevent this situation from happening in the future is to make the decision for them about who will have access to the toy first; in my program we pay attention to who had a work/toy first, and calmly tell the other child that right not the work is unavailable because their friend is using it (we always use names though). Then we attempt to redirect children to other works that ARE available, whether they are similar or not. This teaches them inhibitory control, engages mental flexibility because they have to switch to a different activity, and it teaches them to respect their friends' space, bodies, and needs.

Jennie Gabel

9/17/2018 08:24:27 pm

I believe this is normal behavior for this age group. Children are testing their boundaries - finding out what they can and cannot get away with. Children at this age need to learn to share, take turns and play well with other children. One way to possibly avoid this scenario in future would be to make sure there are mutliple similar toys for children if possible.

noelly

9/17/2018 09:38:07 pm

n/a

hope mcclure

9/17/2018 09:55:49 pm

This is appropriate behavior. Toddlers are in a constant state of "mine, mine mine" and boundary testing. While the teacher could have used this opportunity to teach about sharing and kindness with friends as well as taking turns,

Shril D. Sampson

9/18/2018 05:57:20 pm

Yes this should have been used as a learning experience for both the sub and the children, not only was it about sharing but it was also about careing about others and their feelings. Each child wanted the toy and the teacher could have joined in with the toy and had a pretend conversation with an imaginary friend to show that each child was hurt and each child could help the other by caring and sharing.

Destiny Valdes

9/18/2018 08:19:30 pm

I would let my co-worker know that this is normal behavior for children their age. I would also let her know she did great, but maybe try diverting the children's interest on another toy first. Then if that doesn't work, you can tell them the toy is taken away. After the toy is put up, try to distract them with another activity or toy.

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